Sunday, October 7, 2018

A Wild Afternoon:: The Fruit of my work

"Wait a little while and the fruit will fall into your hands"-Esperanza Rising

This is going down as one of our best, most wild days together. She was in such a rare form. I have never experienced any thing like this before. This is a side of her that I don't know if I have seen before. She was cracking herself up so much and laughing so hard. This is a day that I want to remember. I took a picture of us together to commemorate this day. We compared our  hand sizes, I showed her my stitches scars, I told her about how I singed off some of my thumb hair today, had many laughing fits, listened to the Beatles and we're entertaining each other with some comedy. There she sat, and I sat on a black stool next to her.You can't plan for  days like this, they just happen and they are amazing. We had so much fun together! We are such comedians together! When I came home, I was telling my mom all of the things that happened and all of the things that she said in the 2 1/2 hours I was there. I was sitting in our kitchen and I was laughing so hard. 

I can't really explain the joy or how grateful I am. I am so glad that she lives so near me. This was an amazing afternoon with her. I had already seen her this morning at Mass. I didn't sit with her but I hung around with her after Mass in the Narthex. I am always so proud to be hanging around with her! She told me that my jacket was "nice" and I helped her to navigate back through the Narthex and church and back to the car. I think she said "hi there" when I said "bye" to her when she was in the car. I wasn't able to do brunch with them all today since I had to babysit for some of the afternoon. On my way home they were watching the packer game. I can't just drive past her house with out stopping in.   I hadn't planned on staying long since I wanted to clean out the barn today. But things were going so well, more than well really, and I just couldn't leave. We didn't do our average routine of a rosary, some reading, me telling her the feast day or even flicking through SmugMug on her iPad, but we had a beyond average day. It's not like she had a perfect memory, but it was probably as close to perfect as she can get now. and I still had to adjust things for her 80,000 times. and she still said things that made absolutely no sense, but, this was an amazing day. The dementia was still there, but its almost like it was a little absent for just a while. It was a really good day. I want more days like this with her. I will take every day and every moment like this with her that I can!

Days like this, moments like these with her, make me feel like I could fly. I have more confidence. I beam. I feel like I am on top of the world. I feel refreshed. encouraged. renewed. full of joy. the  pain and memories of the bad days, the difficulties, the discouragement all melt away and I think "I want to do this more". "Let's do this again!" , "I want to do so many things with her!" I am on an upbeat. I feel like I've conquered the world. I re-claimed a lot of much needed sanity this afternoon with her!

What is the fruit of my work?
-when she says, "I am so glad that you came today" when I hug her goodbye.
-when she says, "I love you" to me and kisses me on the cheek.
-when her caregiver says, "she was asking for you"
-when I walk in and she gets so excited to see me.

(and, yes, I am already planning what we will do tomorrow...maybe some magazine reading... I won't have too long to stay there but we're going to pack it in. I told her caregiver to text me when she is awake. So I will be awaiting an ever important text. I can't wait to be with her again! I love her so much!)


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